Realwomen of BC - Archives - March2008

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THE REAL NEWS The R.E.A.L WOMEN of BC Newsletter March 2008, P.O. Box 39068, Point Grey RPO, Vancouver, BC V6R 4P1, Tel/Fax: 604- 463-1611, website: http://www.realwomen.bc.ca
The Circle of Life All of Canada has heard about the “celebration” of the 20th anniversary of the infamous Morgentaler case. In January l988, the Supreme Court of Canada struck down the abortion law and, as we all know, Canadians have not had a law in this regard since. We can be grateful to Dr. Morgentaler who prides himself on having “helped” thousands of women over the years. Some people even thought he should get the Order of Canada for his “service to women.” In all the discussions regarding the abortion issue, very seldom do we hear the outcome of an abortion that ultimately did NOT take place. What happens in such cases? Where are the people? What was the outcome? Below is the true story of one of our REAL Women members. The young woman was nervous. The doctor looked at her kindly and asked if she was sure she wanted to go through with it. She shook her head. It was not truly her choice but considering the fact that she already had two children and was married to an abusive, alcoholic man, what could she do? Her husband insisted that he had no intention of feeding “another brat.” It had not been easy to get to the doctor’s office. Abortion was not fully legal in her country and any woman considering such a procedure had to get permission. The government had set up a system by which women could, under unusual circumstances, be granted an abortion. Considering her situation, she was allowed to go ahead with terminating her pregnancy. But now, sitting in the doctor’s office, getting ready for the procedure, she had tears in her eyes. The doctor noticed. “If you are not fully convinced that this is truly what you want to do,” the doctor cautioned, “do not go through with it. You will regret it for the rest of your life.” After talking a little longer, the young woman rose from her chair, thanked the doctor and left, still pregnant. He had talked her out of it. The young woman’s husband was furious upon hearing that she was still pregnant. Her life became even more miserable for a while until her husband finally resigned himself to the fact that another “brat” was on its way. How time changes one’s outlook on things. Thirty years later, one daughter was married with four children but living halfway across the world. The “almost aborted one” was also married with a little girl. That granddaughter became the grandparents’ greatest joy in their older age. But here the story does not end. Ten years later, the husband was very ill in the hospital. It was his youngest daughter, the one he did not want 40 years ago, who attended him day and night. She fed and washed him when the nurses were busy and was by his side during his last few days on earth. As it turned out, these last few days were very precious. It was during these days that the man told his daughter what a wonderful daughter she had always been and he wished he had had more like her. She needed to hear him say it and he needed to say it to her to find peace. Fortunately for both of them, euthanasia or physician assisted suicide was not legal and so their much needed time together was not shortened by some physician who thought he would help his patient “die with dignity.” In our society, people often think that an abortion is a quick fix to a problem. We all know that this is not so and many women suffer greatly, emotionally and often physically. However, what is less talked about is the impact on our lives an abortion has because there is now someone MISSING. As the story above shows, the one that was supposed to be aborted turned out to be the one who gave her parents joy through the gift of a granddaughter and who looked after her parents when they were ill and dying.